mrs. deeds

i'm a little late to the Easter posting, but for good reason; i was out of town and being refreshed with some of my dearest friends. i made it home in time to have a nice easter meal with my own sweet family, and it was almost too easy to forget all about the Reason for the Season (why don't we use that mantra at Easter as well?). at one point i was frustrated and spitting harsh words at my beloved and the little voice came quietly but persistantly: it's not about you, misty. it's about Me, and what I did, for you. my temper tantrum at a broken picture frame? nothing compared to the anguish my Lord felt, hanging on a cross. sobering.

in the few moments my sweet oldest boy let me listen to a different cd than his choice, i listened to an old standby currently pushed aside in favor of ipod downloads, jennifer knapp's kansas. love it. one of my favorite songs, trinity, sings it perfectly: "they profess to know God, but deceive Him by deeds all the while." how is it i get so caught up in the doing instead of the knowing. as meg has oft-told me, we read the bible not so we get something out of it, but so that we may get to know the Author. yes.

i pray i stop deceiving by my mere actions that can barely stand let alone fall, crumpled, at the feet of Jesus. i pray that i not only profess with my tongue that He is risen, but that i live it out loud before my family and those around me. may i be desirable because he is the only reason we have.